Laura Krumwiede Scott remembers 1st Lt Joel Gentz on the anniversary of his death.

In remembrance of 1^st Lt Joel Gentz

Who served the United States Air Force Proudly

Written by Laura Krumwiede Scott

As Life happens, there are many times that make you say, “Wow I have to be strong and I have to get through this one.” In my life there have been many occurrences that made me grow up. Most of the hard times I held my mother’s hand through it but this particular time I was the one holding a hand to give strength.

My best friend, Kathryn lost her husband in the Afghanistan War only a month after Joel was deployed.  It was such a heartache and so painful to hear that he had died. As soon as I heard I wanted to be with Kathryn and hold her hand to give her strength.  I realized that she was surrounded by people who loved her and people who would comfort her.  My time to be with her would come.

Flying to Indiana for the funeral was surreal trying to realize a friend had been killed and it was Kathryn’s husband. I was anxious as I wondered IF I had the strength to be strong for her through this awful time. I wondered if I would fall apart when I saw her---I didn’t want to do that! I wanted to be strong. I had to be brave as she took me to buy her dress; to make decisions about the funeral; and to sit and talk about all the memories.  I didn’t think about the funeral I just knew I had to remain steady through it for Kathryn. I was very honored to sit next to Kathryn in the front row of her husband’s funeral. She had tons of supportive people around her but she chose me.

I remember sitting in the front row staring at the coffin covered by an American flag and listening to the song that had been sung just two years prior at their wedding. There were no words I could say just simply hold the widow’s hand and so I did.  I held it through the service, the playing of “Taps,” “Amazing Grace” and through the slide show of Joel’s life on earth. I knew my presence wasn’t what she really wanted; she wanted her husband’s hand.

There are many people going through different struggles some big and some small. Regardless of the severity of the problems, people need someone to “hold their hand.” People need to realize that sometimes to get through a situation one must have support.  Seek out friends, family or even counseling to get you through hard times.

Yes, Kathryn has moved on with her life but with much support from family, friends and even strangers as she tries to sort out the death of her husband, trying to understand the senseless of his death. May God bring peace to us all.